It has been a crazy month of healing for me. My intention was to release the water retention my body is holding onto. Even though I eat an amazingly healthy diet and train in the gym 4 – 5 times a week I still carry weight.
I feel as though it does not belong to me. It is weird to say but I feel it is just a covering and not part of me. Obviously when you look at me it is a part of me but it feels foreign.
It started with a Theta healing session with Sandra Matulick, where I uncovered some emotions from the past that I had no idea were still affecting me now. I have done so much ‘therapy’ on these issues and I feel pretty good about these particular topics.
We also uncovered some emotions that I had taken on for others that I did not realise.
What I am learning on my journey is you may have cleared the trauma from the subconscious mind but the cells in your body have memory, so even though you change the thought patterns from the past, sometimes it takes the body a while to catch up.
The Theta healing was powerful.
Two weeks ago I did a shamanic walk with my friend Heather Price. I got so much out of listening and connecting back with nature.
Heather, myself and a group of women walked together and listened to mother nature and stopped to hear and see what the rocks, trees, plants, animals were telling us.
As the walk progressed we noticed a theme it was a story about how a woman grows and it was telling us about our emotional journey, how resilient we are and how we get through regardless of the hiccups along the way.
How, when we listen to the things around us we are fully supported.
We saw so many things on the walk. Heather explained what they meant from a shamanic level;
I saw a bear’s head in the rocks. Bear loves honey and hugging and they remind us to be generous with our sweet and gentle nature.
We also used to call my day Blue bear from Jungle book. (he used to scratch his back on the doorways like Blue) 🙂
Knowing that my dads energy was with me on my walk made it more special.
The bird energy was strong too, we saw a bird in the rocks. Bringing in the air element to the earth and water so rich around us. Reminding us to rise above the illusion of feeling over burdened or encumbered and choose peaceful thoughts instead.
Crow energy. Crow reminds us of the natural laws. And to walk strongly in the world. To know our values. To speak our truth.
We saw whales everywhere, they remind us we have our own unique song of life to sing and not to afraid to be the BIG version of Self.
A mammal at home in the sea it reminds us to breathe consciously and to prepare ourselves for when we need to dive deep onto life.
Whales are creatures of habit and move gracefully with the seasons. Moving to safe and warm familiar places to give birth and create life. They sing songs through the deep, following natural song lines. Reminding us to be in time with nature and our our own true nature.
A HUGE turtle rock. Turtles are comfortable in the water and can move fast using its shell to keep it close up the surface and for protection when it needs to retreat.
It reminds us we carry all we need within us and in our genes to stay afloat and carry our burdens and to be free and comfortable. It reminds us to take our burdens to the great ocean so they seem less cumbersome.
The ocean is nature’s playground and it fills voids so easily. Washing us clean and lightening the load.
Man Nature and Spirit everywhere. You can see the naive attempt of man to support nature here. There was evidence of this elsewhere. An attempt to blend any additions into the landscape.
Unlike the modern day intrusion of steel posts and orange synthetic string, wire mesh fences and plastic bins. We have forgotten some how to be ‘part of’, merge with and to blend, choosing instead to shut out and repel.
So this walk for me was so informative. It was telling me that I could seek refuge in nature, that I was strong enough to deal with those old emotions, that I could rise up above the feeling of being overburdened.
That it is safe for me to be me and do the big things in the world I am here to do. Also that sometimes we need to delve deeper into our emotions rather than scratching the surface.
I also got some amazing photos too… The main image was a picture I took halfway through the shamanic walk of an island in Sydney Harbour. Very fitting to this saying…..
No man is an island meaning; No one is self-sufficient; everyone relies on others. This saying comes from a sermon by the seventeenth-century English author John Donne.
In fact I got home from the walk and I was so tired I slept for 3 hours that afternoon as my body was integrating.
One week later, my body started speaking to me. I guess I am now ready to start releasing these emotions. For most of my life I have had hearing issues. I am on the borderline of needing a hearing aid.
Loss of hearing or ear issues, when looking at a metaphoric level means ask yourself, “What do you not want to hear?”. You are effectively ‘tuning out’.
So this week I got chronic pain in my ears. I was in so much pain that I was laying in a foetal position screaming because it felt like red hot pokers were being forced down my ear canal. It started with one ear and a day later the other was the same.
I tried sucking it up and living through it without painkillers for a day hoping it would get better. It did not. Two days later I went to the Dr’s and got told I had severe otitis externa (water on the ear).
Now this makes sense to me because in so many things water means emotions. When looking at the tarot cards, dream analysis, water signs in the zodiac can absorb “vibes” from others more easily that the other signs.
So other than the pain that has been coming up for release, (while in this pain memories of my childhood of when I used to hold my emotions in because it was not safe for me to show them.
I remember when I was a child I would close my eyes, take myself to another place and rock myself for comfort) I have lost my hearing.
It has now been nearly a week, that I have lived in silence. I have had nothing to distract me, other than a bit of made up sign language when my partner is trying to ask me something.
While resting, I have been asking my body what I need to hear and it gave me an answer. I have not been listening to my body. I have pushed it, controlled it, starved it, hated it, abused it and taken on other people’s emotions to try to protect them.
I need to listen to it, love it, understand it, know that it has been protecting me from myself! Now I am still deaf but I have a feeling I am getting close to some deep healing here. My hearing is coming back slightly and the pain is getting a little less.
I have another Theta healing booked for Friday so I am interested to see what else comes up. I also have a sound healing soon as well. My intention is to release these emotions on a deeper level than I ever have before.
The reason I want to share my story with you is that we can find healing in so many ways. If I had gone straight to the Dr and taken antibiotics, (which I am using btw to help release the infection.
I was using garlic oil but my ear canal closed up so nothing was reaching the infection) and not looked at the clues from nature and my body, I may not have got all those other messages. I know for me releasing emotions is not something I have found easy in my life.
It has been easier for me to hold on to them so I dont feel vulnerable but that has not got me very far at all. I am learning it is safe to be vulnerable and you always get sent the support you need when you accept help. I hope my story holds some value for you.
Change your emotions. Change your health.
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You can contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org to see how I can help you. Sharon is the founder of Global Healing Exchange. You can work with her on her Emotional Freedom Program here.